the Monday Musings column from that consultant bloke

I have long been aware of vegetarian sausages, burgers and such, but doing the weekly shop I came across a vegetarian haggis.

Over my life I have been aware that some of my friends, colleagues and one relative are people who don’t eat meat. I have no problem with that because I believe in people having a choice, and, whilst I am an omnivore, there are things thatI will not eat because I choose not to. I do not have, to the best of my knowledge, any food allergies, but there are foods that make me feel ill after eating them and some I just can’t face.

I enjoy food, and come into the live to eat category more that the eat to live. I like to cook and try to cook healthy meals from scratch so the the Berkshire Belle and I have a decent diet. We have cut down on quantities over the years and eat somewhat frugally these days, Meat or fish form the protein element of our dinners most nights, although we do occasionally have a vegetarian meal, usually a curry.

Our basic premise for cooking is to buy decent ingredients and cook them simply: We enjoy good food done well, and neither of us can understand why you would want to disguise one thing as another. It is one thing to take a vegetable mix and shape it as a burger or sausage for convenience , for example to fit into an appropriate shaped bun, but why try to disguise it as meat?

Nearly 50 years ago I was fed what looked like, and sort of tasted like, minced beef in gravy served over a baked potato. After eating it I was told that it was not beef, but tofu. My hostess, Stella, seemed very pleased to have fooled me, but my only thought was that she had promised a tasty meal, and that was what she had delivered. But the thought had struck me then: If you don’t want to eat meat, why try to make something look and taste like it?

Which leads us back to haggis, something that requires various parts of an animal, along with other stuff, to make. If you don’t put the meaty bits in it ain’t haggis. What is the point of making something look like it is meat to serve to someone that does not eat meat? Even more bonkers, to me, is tory and make something that is not meat to taste like meat and feed it to someone who does not eat meat.

The world of 2025 is a truly strange place to me.